They Never Saw It Coming: 2010-2011 English Premier League Opening Weekend Wrap-Up

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SATURDAY

1.0

To make it easy, here’s a condensed version of the results:

Wolverhampton Wanderers 2-1 Stoke

-Good win for Wolves, They’d need every point for the impending Relegation Battle in May.

Tottenham Hotspurs 0-0 Manchester City

Bolton 0-0 Fulham

Blackburn 1-0 Everton

-Yawn.

Sunderland 2-2 Birmingham

-Gritty and hard-fought.

2.0

Now, for the Notable Matches:

Aston Villa 3-0 West Ham

-MON who? Caretaker Manager Kevin McDonald led Villa to a resounding win versus the hapless Hammers.

Chelsea 6-0 West Bromwich Albion

Didier Drogba gets a hat-trick, Florent Malouda scores a brace and Frank Lampard scores a non-deflected goal as Chelsea make history by clocking the best Premier League Opening Day Thrashing. Poor WBA.

3.0

Cinderella Story of the Week:

Blackpool 4-0 Wigan

For anyone who watched the match that had no previous idea about the Premier League, Wigan looked the side that came from the Championship. Blackpool should savor that win and their current league position, as I’m pretty sure both will never happen again within the season.

SUNDAY

Liverpool and Arsenal played the sole match on Anfield.

1.0

I got a bit choked up during the Anfield crowd rendition of You’ll Never Walk Alone during the pre-match coverage. That will always be one song that will never fail to move me to tears.

2.0

Cesc Fabregas was missing from the Arsenal lineup supposedly due to a “chest infection”. You don’t fool me for a bit, Cesc. Bet you were just sad and missing Pique.

3.0

Seeing the new boys with their new numbers always affects me in a strange way. When I saw Milan Jovanovic walk out with #14 shirt my first thought was “He can win the Premier League for us single-handedly and still he’d never live up to Xabi’s legacy.” When Joe Cole walked out wearing #10, my thought was “Since when does a midfielder wear Liverpool’s #10 shirt?” and “That number will always belong to Michael Owen’s legacy.” Yeah, so I’m both territorial and sentimental. Deal with it.

4.0

First half was hella frustrating for Liverpool. It was all about defense, defense and bloody Defense. Things got infinitely interesting during stoppage time as newbie Joe Cole got red-carded on his Anfield debut. His challenge was totally not worthy of a red, though. Pffft.

5.0

Speaking of Joe Cole, it seems every player who has worn Liverpool’s #10 Post-Michael Owen hasn’t always had the best of luck. Coincidence? Perhaps this deserves a separate post altogether…

6.0

I am officially christening David Ngog as Eggnog. Thank you for that silky goal.

7.0

When Fernando Torres came on to the sidelines for his substitution, I had a sensory overload as I didn’t know which to focus on first: The Anfield crowd singing The Torres Song (His armband proved he was a Red, Torres Torres…), Nando doing a Proud, Determined Version of his Bitchface or his new super dark hair. In the end, they all became irrelevant when he winked at David Ngog. That made my night.

8.0

Pepe Reina. Iker Casillas just shed a tear over that Own Goal. Never mind. That was a blip and shit happens and you’ve saved our derrieres countless times already, so you’re more than forgiven.

9.0

I will not be a card-carrying Torres Fangirl if I don’t bear swag:

Fernando Torres Clips vs Arsenal:

Video Download Link

I personally would not have chosen that song for the video, but then again, who cares about the track when Nando in all his glory is in the picture?

MONDAY

Manchester United vs Newcastle United, otherwise known as Michael Owen’s Present and Immediate Past Team.

In a nutshell, Manchester United demolished the Toon 3-0, Wayne Rooney was anonymous and Michael didn’t play as a precaution. At least I didn’t bother to stay up to watch the match. Oh, and welcome back to the Premier League, Newcastle.

So there.  Until EPL Week 2, then.

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